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Monday, November 11, 2019

Emotional Healing through Journaling

November 11, 2019 1 Comments

It may sound good to know that simple journaling can emotionally heal you as well. Simply penning down your thought can so recovering. As a Psychological Counselor, I use this writing technique for my client for their emotional healing. I train them how to use it in their day to day life and believe me it's so catheretic. 

Writing about our own difficulties and dreams helps us experience increased happiness, health and productivity. This technique helps in finding meaning in the mess. When you write and re-read and your writing can further deepen your understanding and healing. I have found that writing down not only helps us understand where the feelings are coming from, it also makes it easier to let go of the negative emotions. 

Many of us simply hold our emotions, storing them away in our bodies, and we become emotionally constipated, unable to let go of that which isn't helping us in any way. Eventually, when our system gets too backed up, we get sick. We can no longer function as we should. Become sluggish, unresponsive depressed.

So really, your journal is like prunes for the Soul, somethings that help you regulate. So let's start with how to write a journal for emotional healing. 

• Don't worry about spelling, grammar and formatting. Just let going and keep going.
• Just follow the line rest keep flowing with words and thoughts.
• Write regularly. Just block your alarm clock just for 20-30 minutes every day. Slowly and gradually become easier and more effective with more practice.
• Aim for 750 words daily that means 3 pages all together if you are writing by hand. That is really just a minimum amount and mostly free thoughts.

You will lose an opportunity to dig deeper into your own mind lead to more insight means great healing.

Friday, October 4, 2019

Counseling on Phone

October 04, 2019 0 Comments

A few years ago, I set out to investigate what helps and hinders people in accessing counseling. Participants reported that phone counseling is extremely helpful. I got curious about phone counseling and I sought phone therapy over the past 6 months. It was definitely helpful to access therapy from the comfort of my home, I did not have to commute, and it provided some ease in talking about my past family traumas. Specifically, I could have a nap after a draining session or take one of my dogs out for a refreshing walk. The distance helped with the shame piece; it was easier to talk about difficult topics. . . .


PROs
  • Counseling at your place - you could be at your home, office, travelling, on a favourite walk destination and talk to your therapist.
  • No need to commute – You don’t need waste time in road traffic and catching public transport. Just talk counseling wherever you are.
  • No need to change counselor - You don’t need to find a different counselor just because you have shifted to a different location. You need to choose a counselor with whom you feel comfortable and understood.
  • Consult a qualified counselor even if this service is not available in your place. You don’t need to compromise on your mental health just because your city doesn’t have counselor. Get counselor wherever you are.
  • A great option for people with mobility issues - If you can’t move out of your house because you have a physical disability or you don’t have a car, or you can’t leave your kid alone at home, therapy can still happen - ONLINE.

CONs
  • You always miss the feel of sitting in front of a counselor with all his body language, gestures, expressions and the vibes. Hmmm, they are also very useful things.
  • Network problems can be really disruptive for therapy sessions because they break the flow and act as major irritants.
  • Online Counseling or Phone-Counseling is not meant for severe psychiatric disorders.

So, my client finally decided to get started with phone counseling. We talked on the phone because she was in a remote area where the internet was not good enough for video calls.

So what are you waiting for? 

Just contact and talk. Break the 


Disclaimer: I am not suggesting that phone counseling replace in-person counseling, nor am I suggesting phone counseling for trauma. I recommend EMDR combined with yoga/meditation for trauma healing.

Monday, September 23, 2019

How to be a Family Therapist?

September 23, 2019 3 Comments


Family therapy or family counselling is designed to address specific issues that affect the psychological health of the family, such as major life transitions or mental health conditions. It may be used as the primary mode of treatment or as a complementary approach.

Counseling and Family Therapy


The Benefits of Family Counseling

Families can benefit from therapy when they experience any stressful event that may strain family relationships, such as financial hardship, divorce, or the death of a loved one. Also, it can be effective in treating mental health concerns that impact the family as a whole, such as depression, substance abuse, chronic illness, and food issues, or everyday concerns, like communication problems, interpersonal conflict, or behavioural problems in children and adolescents.

Family counselling aims to promote understanding and collaboration among family members to solve the problems of one or more individuals. For example, if a child is having social and academic problems, therapy will focus on the family patterns that may contribute to the child's acting out, rather than evaluating the child's behaviour alone. As the family uncovers the source of the problem, they can learn to support the child and other family members and work proactively on minimizing or altering the conditions that contribute to the child's unwanted behaviour.

How to Become Counseling & Family Therapy?
Any individual you have a Masters Degree in Psychology and undergone some training can become a family therapist. All though technically you don't any degree for doing counselling and family therapy but in order to gain theoretical and practical approach in counselling of any family you must go for some course in family therapy. It can be any certificate course in family therapy.

Do we need RCI Registration to work as Family Therapist??
No. Working as a counsellor in any field including family therapy you don't need RCI registration. But if you work in the field of Disorder and rehabilitation and you are making in diagnosis, you must be registered under Rehabilitation Council of India. 



Role of Counselor & Family Therapist?
A family therapist typically meets with an entire family to discuss and examine the issues that are interfering in their lives. However, a family therapist also performs one-on-one counselling time if necessary with family members. The goal of therapy is to address emotional or mental issues that are harming the family. For example, families may be undergoing some sort of crisis at work or a psychological conflict with them. By talking with patients, a family therapist seeks to address and modify these issues.

सोशल मीडिया में उलझे हमारे रिश्ते

September 23, 2019 1 Comments

रीता अचानक ही कुछ बदली बदली लग रही है। उसका व्यवहार भी कुछ बदल गया है। वह बहुत खुश रहने लगी है परन्तु परिवार में अब ज्यादा घुलती मिलती भी नही। हाँ हमेशा सिर्फ अपने मोबाइल फ़ोन में ही उल्झी रहती है। चाहे वो कहीं भी रहे उसका फ़ोन उसके साथ होना चाहिए। यहाँ तक की रसोई में खाना पकाते हुए भी। जब हमने कभी फ़ोन का प्रयोग कम करने को कहते है तो उखर जाती है और गुस्सा करने लगती है। ये कहना था उसके पति उमेश का। रीता और उमेश की यह समस्या सिर्फ उनकी ही नही बल्कि आज के हर घर की है। यह समस्या देखने और समझने में बहुत बड़ी नही थी। परन्तु ये छोटी सी समस्या कब हमारे रिश्तों को अंदर ही अंदर खोख्ला करने लगती हैं। आइये आज की शुरुआत हम सोशल मीडिया के प्रभाव के बारे में जानते है। 

आज कल हमारे स्मार्ट फ़ोन और भी ज्यादा स्मार्ट हो गए हैं । ये हमे दुनिया भर में फैले हमारे सगेम्बन्धियों से जोड़े रहने का बहुत ही अच्छा माध्यम हैं। फेसबुक, वीचैट, व्हट्सऐप और बबम अब लगभग हर घर में बस्ते हैं। क्या अपने कभी सोचा है कि यह स्मार्ट फ़ोन आपके शादी शुदा जिंदगी के लिए खतरे की घंटी बन सकता है?
जब कभी आप एक्स्ट्रा मैरिटल अफेयर के में सोचते हैं तो आप सिर्फ शारीरिक संबंधों के बारे में सोचते हैं। हाँ!! हर व्यक्ति यही सोचता है। हम दूसरे तरीकों से होने वाले धोखाधड़ी को भूल जाते हैं। या मैं तो यह कहूँगी की उन्हें कई बार पता ही नही होता कि यह भी एक धोखा ही है। 

हाँ मैं बात कर रही हूँ सोशल मीडिया का प्रयोग करते हुए हो रहे मनोवैज्ञानिक और भावनात्मक धोखेबाजी की। मैं इसे नाम दूंगी ऑनलाइन अफेयर का। हमारा मष्तिष्क, भावनातमक लगाव होने पर भी बिलकुल उसी तरह का रसायन प्रतिक्रिया उत्त्पन्न करता हैं जैसा कि शारीरिक सम्बन्ध होने पर होती है। कोई भौतिक संपर्क ना होने पर भी, यह रासायनिक प्रतिक्रिया उत्त्पन्न होती है। ९९% लोग इस ऑनलाइन अफेयर में हैं, परन्तु कोई इसे स्वीकार नही करते। 

चलिए देखते हैं आप कहाँ खड़े हैं। 

  • क्या आप अपना ज्यादातर वक़्त एक खास व्यक्ति से चैटिंग करते हुए व्यतीत करते हैं?
  • क्या आपके मस्तिष्क में किसी एक ही व्यक्ति के बारे में सोचते हैं?
  • आप कुछ घंटों में उत्तर नहीं मिलने पर बेचैनी महसूस होती है, और उत्तर मिलने पर आराम आ जाता है?
  • अपने पति/पत्नी से ज्यादा उस खास व्यक्ति से बातें करना अच्छा लगता है।
  • क्या आपके पति/पत्नी या परिवार या दोस्त के प्रतिरोध पर आपने किसी का नाम बदल कर कुछ और ही रख दिया है? और अक्सर ही बदलते रहते हैं?
  • क्या आप अपने सारे इमेल्स के पासवर्ड बदल दिए हैं? और आपने एक जाली सोशल खाता खोला है और वह आप उसे गुप्त रूप से प्रयोग करते हैं?
  • जब भी कोई आपसे उस व्यक्ति के बारे में या फ़ोन कम प्रयोग करने के बारे बात करता है तो आपको गुस्सा आता है और चिढ़ होती है।
  • आप अपने साथी को अपने इस खास व्यक्ति अक्सर ही तुलना करते हैं और अपने साथी के बारे में अत्यधिक बुरा सोचने लगे हैं?
  • आप वयस्क चुटकुले, चित्र, वित्तीय मुद्दों, व्यक्तिगत शरीर के विवरण और पेशेवर रहस्य भी साँझा करते हुए नही झिझकते?
  • अपने साथी के साथ शारीरक संबंध होते समय उस खास व्यक्ति के साथ होने की इच्छा है?

ज्यादातर हाँ आपके ऑनलाइन अफेयर की प्रगाढ़ता हो दर्शा रहा है। इस के होने कई कारण हो सकते है। जैसे कि आपके साथी के साथ अच्छे सम्बन्ध का न होना, रिश्ते में ऊब का होना, उत्तेजना का न होना, बहुतायत रूप से गलतफहमी का होना। 

आइये जानते है की इनसे कैसे निपटा जा सकता है। 

आज ही मैसेजिंग बंद कर दीजिये। अगर आपको लगता है कि आप धीरे धीरे रोक देंगे तो ऐसा नही होगा। 
जब भी आपको इच्छा होती है मैसेजिंग करने की तो बार बार स्वयं को याद दिलाएं कि आपके लिए आपके असली रिश्ते कितने महत्वपूर्ण हैं। 

जब भी आप पाएं कि आप अपने साथी की तुलना् उस खास व्यक्ति से कर रहे हैं, तब आप खुद को रोकिये और अपने साथी के साथ बिताये खास पलों को याद कीजिए जिनका अपने भरपूर आनद उठाया था। 

जब भी आपका मन उस खास व्यक्ति की ओर जाता है तब स्वंय को एक वफादार साथी के रूप में देखिये। 

मैं उम्मीद करती हूँ कि यह लेख आपके ऑनलाइन अतिरिक्त वैवाहिक संबंध के लिए अपने जुनून को काम करने में आपकी मदद करेगा. 


Monica Sharma
Counsellor / Psychologist
+91 8527811160 / 81300 14427

Extra Marital Affairs

September 23, 2019 3 Comments


Extra-Marital Affairs can happen in any marriages, happy or troubled. It does not mean that something is missing in any partner or at home. This can happen at any point in time or in any life stage. There are some external stimuli that push people away from balance.

Stimuli can be any big success or achievement or even failure in career or any other aspect where an individual feels inflated and entitled or might feeling inadequate or family illness or change of life circumstances.
There are so many other reasons which force an individual to stay away from their commitment and responsibility. It does not mean that they are unhappy with you. Don’t blame yourself. Blaming yourself and taking responsibility for their affair is a very common reaction. This would be a wrong assumption.
It would be extremely traumatizing for you. It is very normal to feel cheated, dishearten, experience depression and a profound sense of loss.
Whatever the scene maybe but marriages can do and survive from extramarital affairs, can also become stronger and more intimate. Just need the commitment and desire from both sides.
Take it as a wake-up call that needs to be addressed timely. This could be time for improving communication, reconnecting and creating a new bond.
It’s best to have a good understanding of what led your relationship down this path. Leaving without knowing what actually happened, increases the probability of repeating the same pattern a second time.

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Saturday, August 3, 2019

Confidentiality in Counseling

August 03, 2019 0 Comments


When clients get in touch about an issue they wish to discuss and overcome, they’re often anxious and apprehensive. Often they are fearful and embarrassed too. They feel vulnerable. The success or outcome of any therapy is often determined by rapport and trust between the client and therapist.

I immerse myself in my work and the client's personal situation, and really put myself in their shoes. The utmost respect and confidentiality are given to the client, as is my undivided attention and also out of office hours time. I often speak to clients in between sessions at length giving them support as much as they require, there are no limits.

If you are looking to talk to someone about any of these issues - anxiety, stress, insomnia, irritable bowel syndrome, panic attacks, low self-esteem, low confidence, phobias and fears - please get in touch.

You can either email me at phonixcentre@gmail.com or go to my website www.phonixcentre.in and book appointment using appointment link.